In times of great personal stress, when one has diminished control of their faculties due to excessive alcohol consumption; there are those who help, support and direct the drunk away from further trouble.  They are “Certified Handlers.”

  • Hennessy
  • Jed
  • Tracey

— The Handler’s Code —

Allow the drunk to maintain a shred of dignity.
Truthfully answer any questions the next day, on the fourth successive time the same question is asked; they may lie.
Handle a drunk three times to be considered for certification.
Only a currently certified handler may certify another.